A very happy Actual New Year (January 13th (observed)) to you all! Reminder: if you have not yet logged your resolutions in eLOK, please do so by the 20th.

Though very little of it makes its way to the High Key, there has been a not insignificant level of chatter about how 2016 was “bad.” I find this interesting for two reasons.

The first: time is an uncaring construct that may or may not have been created by the Grand Lock. Just because the last digit of the year has changed does not mean that things will get better or worse for you.

The second: if things have gotten worse, remember that you are a member of a secret order with an unmatched level of influence. Maybe fill out a request form of two. We can’t make everybody happy, but maybe if we had a higher turnout in the Celebrity Death Vote then maybe there’d be fewer complaints on your Social Media. (This guilt trip applies only to eligible voters at the level of Pick and above.)

This week’s newsletter perfectly encapsulates this very sentiment. We have another dispatch from the sleepy Grand Lock Lodge in Eden Prarie that accentuates the positive in a difficult situation. Then we have a “Round Up” of discounts that will allow you to better exploit your Status.

Onward and somehow further upward despite the fact that such a prospect seems both impossible and foolhardy.