by Pick W. Hargreave (No. 48324) For those of you that saw Hollywood’s celluloid sugar-coating of Steve Jobs’ life, think back to the opening scene. Well, actually, one caveat: is former Mr. Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher, in the opening scene you’re imagining? If so, stop thinking about that movie, for your own good. We want […]
Welcome, Locks of all ranks and locations. It is time for your weekly update. Open wide. It is almost impossible to believe that it is very nearly June. Of course, we all must believe it, for the Gregorian measurement of time tells us it is so, and The Order of the Grand Lock would never […]
by Cub Reporter Locksmith M. Hoshport (88832) In an effort to curry favor with our many Members of the Order, the Candidates for Leadership have taken to the trail. From time to time, we will check in with our six Candidates as they travel across the globe from Lodge to Lodge. May 16 – Lodge […]
Good afternoon, Locks and Keys. We continue to maintain our trajectory as we swing forward into Campaign Season. The Order of the Grand Lock seeks a bold new Leadership, and as we did last week, this week we bring you a variety of dispatches from the Campaign Trail! Before we dive in, however, a brief respite […]
by Cub Reporter Locksmith M. Hoshport (88832) In an effort to curry favor with our many Members of the Order, the Candidates for Leadership have taken to the trail. From time to time, we will check in with our six Candidates as they travel across the globe from Lodge to Lodge. May 9 – Lodge […]
Hello, all ye Members of the Order. Here’s a quick, free “lifehack” for everyone: when confronted with an officer of the law who is unfamiliar with The Gesture or any other Grand Lock signals you might communicate, try bribing them. It really, really works! Get ready for a journey across the globe as our cub […]
It is in the nature of our order to question everything. Established in 1852, it is in the nature of the Grand Lock Advisory Council to answer everything. You’ve got questions, we have the authority to invent answers. The senator my fellow Locks and I are paying off has suddenly decided to show the beginning […]
Welcome, Locks. I would just like to issue a great big thank you to all of you who attended the various Grand Lock talent shows hosted at each of our outposts across the world. I am told that there were a number of amazing acts, ranging from juggling, to tap dancing, to on-stage computer programming, […]
A Guide to the Vitamins That Are Guaranteed to Bring Immortality By Tumbler B. Chesney (40253) [LEGAL DISCLAIMER: Tumbler Chesney is the oldest living member of the Grand Lock and a lifelong vitamin enthusiast–though not necessarily a certified medical professional. We present this column as an invitation to a journey of wellness, not as medical […]
Good afternoon or evening to you, Locks. Should you be reading this in the morning, please drink your coffee so you are at your most alert before continuing. We shall wait. We take a break from Campaign Season to further our efforts to keep all Members of the Order of the Grand Lock alive for as […]
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